There can hardly remain for me (who am really getting to be a frosty
bachelor, with another white hair, every week or so, in my mustache),
there can hardly flicker up again so cheery a blaze upon the hearth, as
that which I remember, the next day, at Blithedale. It was a wood fire,
in the parlor of an old farmhouse, on an April afternoon, but with the
fitful gusts of a wintry snowstorm roaring in the chimney. Vividly does
that fireside re-create itself, as I rake away the ashes from the embers
in my memory, and blow them up with a sigh, for lack of more inspiring
breath. Vividly for an instant, but anon, with the dimmest gleam, and
with just as little fervency for my heart as for my finger-ends! The
staunch oaken logs were long ago burnt out. Their genial glow must be
represented, if at all, by the merest phosphoric glimmer, like that which
exudes, rather than shines, from damp fragments of decayed trees,
deluding the benighted wanderer through a forest. Around such chill
mockery of a fire some few of us might sit on the withered leaves,
spreading out each a palm towards the imaginary warmth, and talk over our
exploded scheme for beginning the life of Paradise anew.
Paradise, indeed! Nobody else in the world, I am bold to affirm--nobody,
at least, in our bleak little world of New England,--had dreamed of
Paradise that day except as the pole suggests the tropic. Nor, with such
materials as were at hand, could the most skilful architect have
constructed any better imitation of Eve's bower than might be seen in the
snow hut of an Esquimaux. But we made a summer of it, in spite of the
wild drifts.
It was an April day, as already hinted, and well towards the middle of
the month. When morning dawned upon me, in town, its temperature was
mild enough to be pronounced even balmy, by a lodger, like myself, in one
of the midmost houses of a brick block,--each house partaking of the
warmth of all the rest, besides the sultriness of its individual
furnace--heat. But towards noon there had come snow, driven along the
street by a northeasterly blast, and whitening the roofs and sidewalks
with a business-like perseverance that would have done credit to our
severest January tempest. It set about its task apparently as much in
earnest as if it had been guaranteed from a thaw for months to come. The
greater, surely, was my heroism, when, puffing out a final whiff of
cigar-smoke, I quitted my cosey pair of bachelor-rooms,--with a good fire
burning in the grate, and a closet right at hand, where there was still a
bottle or two in the champagne basket and a residuum of claret in a box,
--quitted, I say, these comfortable quarters, and plunged into the heart
of the pitiless snowstorm, in quest of a better life.
The better life! Possibly, it would hardly look so now; it is enough if
it looked so then. The greatest obstacle to being heroic is the doubt
whether one may not be going to prove one's self a fool; the truest
heroism is to resist the doubt; and the profoundest wisdom to know when
it ought to be resisted, and when to be obeyed.
Yet, after all, let us acknowledge it wiser, if not more sagacious, to
follow out one's daydream to its natural consummation, although, if the
vision have been worth the having, it is certain never to be consummated
otherwise than by a failure. And what of that? Its airiest fragments,
impalpable as they may be, will possess a value that lurks not in the
most ponderous realities of any practicable scheme. They are not the
rubbish of the mind. Whatever else I may repent of, therefore, let it be
reckoned neither among my sins nor follies that I once had faith and
force enough to form generous hopes of the world's destiny--yes!--and to
do what in me lay for their accomplishment; even to the extent of
quitting a warm fireside, flinging away a freshly lighted cigar, and
travelling far beyond the strike of city clocks, through a drifting
snowstorm.
There were four of us who rode together through the storm; and
Hollingsworth, who had agreed to be of the number, was accidentally
delayed, and set forth at a later hour alone. As we threaded the streets,
I remember how the buildings on either side seemed to press too closely
upon us, insomuch that our mighty hearts found barely room enough to
throb between them. The snowfall, too, looked inexpressibly dreary (I
had almost called it dingy), coming down through an atmosphere of city
smoke, and alighting on the sidewalk only to be moulded into the impress
of somebody's patched boot or overshoe. Thus the track of an old
conventionalism was visible on what was freshest from the sky. But when
we left the pavements, and our muffled hoof-tramps beat upon a desolate
extent of country road, and were effaced by the unfettered blast as soon
as stamped, then there was better air to breathe. Air that had not been
breathed once and again! air that had not been spoken into words of
falsehood, formality, and error, like all the air of the dusky city!
"How pleasant it is!" remarked I, while the snowflakes flew into my
mouth the moment it was opened. "How very mild and balmy is this country
air!"
"Ah, Coverdale, don't laugh at what little enthusiasm you have left!"
said one of my companions. "I maintain that this nitrous atmosphere is
really exhilarating; and, at any rate, we can never call ourselves
regenerated men till a February northeaster shall be as grateful to us as
the softest breeze of June!"
So we all of us took courage, riding fleetly and merrily along, by stone
fences that were half buried in the wave-like drifts; and through patches
of woodland, where the tree-trunks opposed a snow-incrusted side towards
the northeast; and within ken of deserted villas, with no footprints in
their avenues; and passed scattered dwellings, whence puffed the smoke of
country fires, strongly impregnated with the pungent aroma of burning
peat. Sometimes, encountering a traveller, we shouted a friendly
greeting; and he, unmuffling his ears to the bluster and the snow-spray,
and listening eagerly, appeared to think our courtesy worth less than the
trouble which it cost him. The churl! He understood the shrill whistle
of the blast, but had no intelligence for our blithe tones of brotherhood.
This lack of faith in our cordial sympathy, on the traveller's part,
was one among the innumerable tokens how difficult a task we had in hand
for the reformation of the world. We rode on, however, with still
unflagging spirits, and made such good companionship with the tempest
that, at our journey's end, we professed ourselves almost loath to bid
the rude blusterer good-by. But, to own the truth, I was little better
than an icicle, and began to be suspicious that I had caught a fearful
cold.
And now we were seated by the brisk fireside of the old farmhouse, the
same fire that glimmers so faintly among my reminiscences at the
beginning of this chapter. There we sat, with the snow melting out of
our hair and beards, and our faces all ablaze, what with the past
inclemency and present warmth. It was, indeed, a right good fire that we
found awaiting us, built up of great, rough logs, and knotty limbs, and
splintered fragments of an oak-tree, such as farmers are wont to keep for
their own hearths, since these crooked and unmanageable boughs could
never be measured into merchantable cords for the market. A family of
the old Pilgrims might have swung their kettle over precisely such a fire
as this, only, no doubt, a bigger one; and, contrasting it with my
coal-grate, I felt so much the more that we had transported ourselves a
world-wide distance from the system of society that shackled us at
breakfast-time.
Good, comfortable Mrs. Foster (the wife of stout Silas Foster, who was to
manage the farm at a fair stipend, and be our tutor in the art of
husbandry) bade us a hearty welcome. At her back--a back of generous
breadth--appeared two young women, smiling most hospitably, but looking
rather awkward withal, as not well knowing what was to be their position
in our new arrangement of the world. We shook hands affectionately all
round, and congratulated ourselves that the blessed state of brotherhood
and sisterhood, at which we aimed, might fairly be dated from this moment.
Our greetings were hardly concluded when the door opened, and
Zenobia--whom I had never before seen, important as was her place in our
enterprise--Zenobia entered the parlor.
This (as the reader, if at all acquainted with our literary biography,
need scarcely be told) was not her real name. She had assumed it, in the
first instance, as her magazine signature; and, as it accorded well with
something imperial which her friends attributed to this lady's figure and
deportment, they half-laughingly adopted it in their familiar intercourse
with her. She took the appellation in good part, and even encouraged its
constant use; which, in fact, was thus far appropriate, that our Zenobia,
however humble looked her new philosophy, had as much native pride as any
queen would have known what to do with.