'Though hawks can prey through storms and winds,
The poor bee in her hive must dwell.'
HENRY VAUGHAN.
In imagination the piteous dejection of our family seems to have
lasted for ages, but on comparison of dates it is plain that the
first lightening of the burthen came in about a fortnight's time.
The firm of Frith and Castleford was coming to the front in the
Chinese trade. The junior partner was an old companion of my
father's boyhood; his London abode was near at hand, and he was a
kind of semi-godfather to both Clarence and me, having stood proxy
for our nominal sponsors. He was as good and open-hearted a man as
ever lived, and had always been very kind to us; but he was scarcely
welcome when my father, finding that he had come up alone to London
to see about some repairs to his house, while his family were still
in the country, asked him to dine and sleep--our first guest since
our misfortune.
My mother could hardly endure to receive any one, but she seemed
glad to see my father become animated and like himself while Roman
Catholic Emancipation was vehemently discussed, and the ruin of
England hotly predicted. Clarence moped about silently as usual,
and tried to avoid notice, and it was not till the next morning--
after breakfast, when the two gentlemen were in the dining-room,
nearly ready to go their several ways, and I was in the window
awaiting my classical tutor--that Mr. Castleford said,
'May I ask, Winslow, if you have any plans for that poor boy?'
'Edward?' said my father, almost wilfully misunderstanding. 'His
ambition is to be curator of something in the British Museum, isn't
it?'
Mr. Castleford explained that he meant the other, and my father
sadly answered that he hardly knew; he supposed the only thing was
to send him to a private tutor, but where to find a fit one he did
not know and besides, what could be his aim? Sir John Griffith had
said he was only fit for the Church, 'But one does not wish to
dispose of a tarnished article there.'
'Certainly not,' said Mr. Castleford; and then he spoke words that
rejoiced my heart, though they only made my father groan, bidding
him remember that it was not so much actual guilt as the accident of
Clarence's being in the Navy that had given so serious a character
to his delinquencies. If he had been at school, perhaps no one
would ever have heard of them, 'Though I don't say,' added the good
man, casting a new light on the subject, 'that it would have been
better for him in the end.' Then, quite humbly, for he knew my
mother especially had a disdain for trade, he asked what my father
would think of letting him give Clarence work in the office for the
present. 'I know,' he said, 'it is not the line your family might
prefer, but it is present occupation; and I do not think you could
well send a youth who has seen so much of the world back to
schooling. Besides, this would keep him under your own eye.'
My father was greatly touched by the kindness, but he thought it
right to set before Mr. Castleford the very worst side of poor
Clarence; declaring that he durst not answer for a boy who had
never, in spite of pains and punishments, learnt to speak truth at
home or abroad, repeating Captain Brydone's dreadful report, and
even adding that, what was most grievous of all, there was an
affectation of piety about him that could scarcely be anything but
self-deceit and hypocrisy. 'Now,' he said, 'my eldest son,
Griffith, is just a boy, makes no profession, is not--as I am afraid
you have seen--exemplary at church, when Clarence sits as meek as a
mouse, but then he is always above-board, frank and straightforward.
You know where to have a high-spirited fellow, who will tame down,
but you never know what will come next with the other. I sometimes
wonder for what error of mine Providence has seen fit to give me
such a son.'
Just then an important message came for Mr. Winslow, and he had to
hurry away, but Mr. Castleford still remained, and presently said,
'Edward, I should like to know what your eyes have been trying to
say all this time.'
'Oh, sir,' I burst out, 'do give him a chance. Indeed he never
means to do wrong. The harm is not in him. He would have been the
best of us all if he had only been let alone.'
Those were exactly my own foolish words, for which I could have
beaten myself afterwards; but Mr. Castleford only gave a slight
grave smile, and said, 'You mean that your brother's real defect is
in courage, moral and physical.'
'Yes,' I said, with a great effort at expressing myself. 'When he
is frightened, or bullied, or browbeaten, he does not know what he
is doing or saying. He is quite different when he is his own self;
only nobody can understand.'
Strange that though the favoured home son and nearly sixteen years
old, it would have been impossible to utter so much to one of our
parents. Indeed the last sentence felt so disloyal that the colour
burnt in my cheeks as the door opened; but it only admitted
Clarence, who, having heard the front door shut, thought the coast
was clear, and came in with a load of my books and dictionaries.
'Clarence,' said Mr. Castleford, and the direct address made him
start and flush, 'supposing your father consents, should you be
willing to turn your mind to a desk in my counting-house?'
He flushed deeper red, and his fingers quivered as he held by the
table. 'Thank you, sir. Anything--anything,' he said hesitatingly.
'Well,' said Mr. Castleford, with the kindest of voices, 'let us
have it out. What is in your mind? You know, I'm a sort of
godfather to you.'
'Sir, if you would only let me have a berth on board one of your
vessels, and go right away.'
'Aye, my poor boy, that's what you would like best, I've no doubt;
but look at Edward's face there, and think what that would come to
at the best!'
'Yes, I know I have no right to choose,' said Clarence, drooping his
head as before.
''Tis not that, my dear lad,' said the good man, 'but that packing
you off like that, among your inferiors in breeding and everything
else, would put an end to all hope of your redeeming the past--
outwardly I mean, of course--and lodge you in a position of
inequality to your brothers and sister, and all--'
'Not a bit too old for a fresh beginning,' said Mr. Castleford
cheerily. 'God helping you, you will be a brave and good man yet,
my boy--' then as my master rang at the door--'Come with me and look
at the old shop.'
Poor Clarence muttered something unintelligible, and I had to own
for him that he never went out without accounting for himself.
Whereupon our friend caused my mother to be hunted up, and explained
to her that he wanted to take Clarence out with him--making some
excuse about something they were to see together.
That walk enabled him to say something which came nearer to cheering
Clarence than anything that had passed since that sad return, and
made him think that to be connected with Mr. Castleford was the best
thing that could befall him. Mr. Castleford on his side told my
father that he was sure that the boy was good-hearted all the time,
and thoroughly repentant; but this had the less effect because
plausibility, as my father called it, was one of the qualities that
specially annoyed him in Clarence, and made him fear that his friend
might be taken in. However, the matter was discussed between the
elders, and it was determined that this most friendly offer should
be accepted experimentally. It was impressed on Clarence, with
unnecessary care, that the line of life was inferior; but that it
was his only chance of regaining anything like a position, and that
everything depended on his industry and integrity.
'Integrity!' commented Clarence, with a burning spot on his cheek
after one of these lectures; 'I believe they think me capable of
robbing the office!'
We found out, too, that the senior partner, Mr. Frith, a very crusty
old bachelor, did not like the appointment, and that it was made
quite against his will. 'You'll be getting your clerks next from
Newgate!' was what some amiable friend reported him to have said.
However, Mr. Castleford had his way, and Clarence was to begin his
work with the New Year, being in the meantime cautioned and lectured
on the crime and danger of his evil propensities more than he could
well bear. 'Oh!' he groaned, 'it serves me right, I know that very
well, but if my father only knew how I hate and abhor all those
things--and how I loathed them at the very time I was dragged into
them!'
No more could be said, for the idea of Clarence's untruthfulness and
depravity had become so deeply rooted in our father's mind that
there was little hope of displacing it, and even at the best his
manner was full of grave constrained pity. Those few words were
Clarence's first approach to confidence with me, but they led to
more, and he knew there was one person who did not believe the
defect was in the bent of his will so much as in its strength.
All the time the prospect of the counting-house in comparison with
the sea was so distasteful to him that I was anxious whenever he
went out alone, or even with Griffith, who despised the notion of,
as he said, sitting on a high stool, dealing in tea, so much that he
was quite capable of aiding and abetting in an escape from it. Two
considerations, however, held Clarence back; one, the timidity of
nature which shrank from so violent a step, and the other, the
strong affections that bound him to his home, though his sojourn
there was so painful. He knew the misery his flight would have been
to me; indeed I took care to let him see it.
And Griffith's return was like a fresh spring wind dispersing
vapours. He had gained an excellent scholarship at Brazenose, and
came home radiant with triumph, cheering us all up, and making a
generous use of his success. He was no letter-writer, and after
learning that the disaster and disgrace were all too certain, he
ignored the whole, and hailed Clarence on his return as if nothing
had happened. As eldest son, and almost a University man, he could
argue with our parents in a manner we never presumed on. At least I
cannot aver what he actually uttered, but probably it was a revised
version of what he thundered forth to me. 'Such nonsense! such a
shame to keep the poor beggar going about with that hang dog look,
as if he had done for himself for life! Why, I've known fellows do
ever so much worse of their own accord, and nothing come of it. If
it was found out, there might be a row and a flogging, and there was
an end of it. As to going about mourning, and keeping the whole
house in doleful dumps, as if there was never to be any good again,
it was utter folly, and so I've told Bill, and papa and mamma, both
of them!'
How this was administered, or how they took it, there is no knowing,
but Griff would neither skate nor go to the theatre, nor to any
other diversion, without his brother; and used much kindly force and
banter to unearth him from his dismal den in the back drawing-room.
He was only let alone when there were engagements with friends, and
indeed, when meetings in the streets took place, by tacit agreement,
Clarence would shrink off in the crowd as if not belonging to his
companion; and these were the moments that stung him into longing to
flee to the river, and lose the sense of shame among common sailors:
but there was always some good angel to hold him back from desperate
measures--chiefly just then, the love between us three brothers, a
love that never cooled throughout our lives, and which dear old
Griff made much more apparent at this critical time than in the old
Win and Slow days of school. That return of his enlivened us all,
and removed the terrible constraint from our meals, bringing us
back, as it were, to ordinary life and natural intercourse among
ourselves and with our neighbours.