So, Lady Flora, take my lay,
And if you find a meaning there,
Oh! whisper to your glass, and say,
What wonder, if he thinks me fair.--Tennyson.
Flora and Norman were dining with one of their county acquaintance,
and Dr. May had undertaken to admit them on their return. The fire
shone red and bright, as it sank calmly away, and the timepiece and
clock on the stairs had begun their nightly duet of ticking, the
crickets chirped in the kitchen, and the doctor sat alone. His book
lay with unturned pages, as he sat musing, with eyes fixed on the
fire, living over again his own life, the easy bright days of his
youth, when, without much pains on his own part, the tendencies of
his generous affectionate disposition, and the influences of a warm
friendship, and an early attachment, had guarded him from evil--then
the period when he had been perfectly happy, and the sobering power
of his position had been gradually working on him; but though always
religious and highly principled, the very goodness of his natural
character preventing him from perceiving the need of self-control,
until the shock that changed the whole tenor of his life, and left
him, for the first time, sensible of his own responsibility, but with
inveterate habits of heedlessness and hastiness that love alone gave
him force to combat. He was now a far gentler man. His younger
children had never seen, his elder had long since forgotten, his
occasional bursts of temper, but he suffered keenly from their
effects, especially as regarded some of his children. Though
Richard's timidity had been overcome, and Tom's more serious failures
had been remedied, he was not without anxiety, and had a strange
unsatisfactory feeling as regarded Flora. He could not feel that he
fathomed her! She reminded him of his old Scottish father-in-law,
Professor Mackenzie, whom he had never understood, nor, if the truth
were known, liked. Her dealings with the Ladies' Committee were so
like her grandfather's canny ways in a public meeting, that he
laughed over them--but they were not congenial to him. Flora was a
most valuable person; all that she undertook prospered, and he
depended entirely on her for household affairs, and for the care of
Margaret; but, highly as he esteemed her, he was a little afraid of
her cool prudence; she never seemed to be in any need of him, nor to
place any confidence in him, and seemed altogether so much older and
wiser than he could feel himself--pretty girl as she was--and very
pretty were her fine blue eyes and clear skin, set off by her dark
brown hair. There arose the vision of eyes as blue, skin as clear,
but of light blonde locks, and shorter, rounder, more dove-like form,
open, simple, loving face, and serene expression, that had gone
straight to his heart, when he first saw Maggie Mackenzie making tea.
He heard the wheels, and went out to unbolt the door. Those were a
pair for a father to be proud of--Norman, of fine stature and noble
looks, with his high brow, clear thoughtful eye, and grave
intellectual eagle face, lighting into animation with his rare, sweet
smile; and Flora, so tall and graceful, and in her white dress,
picturesquely half concealed by her mantle, with flowers in her hair,
and a deepened colour in her cheek, was a fair vision, as she came in
from the darkness.
Norman related the circumstances, while his sister remained silently
leaning against the mantel-piece, looking into the fire, until he
took up his candle, and bade them good-night. Dr. May was about to
do the same, when she held out her hand. "One moment, if you please,
dear papa," she said; "I think you ought to know it." "
"Ha!" said Dr. May, beginning to smile. "So that is what he is at,
is it? But what an opportunity to take."
"It was in the conservatory," said Flora, a little hurt, as her
father discovered by her tone. "The music was going on, and I don't
know that there could have been--"
"A better opportunity, eh?" said Dr. May, laughing; "well, I should
have thought it awkward; was he very much discomposed?"
"I thought," said Flora, looking down and hesitating, "that he had
better come to you."
"Indeed! so you shifted the ungracious office to me. I am very glad
to spare you, my dear; but it was hard on him to raise his hopes."
"I thought," faltered Flora, "that you could not disapprove--"
"Flora--" and he paused, completely confounded, while his daughter
was no less surprised at the manner in which her news was received.
Each waited for the other to speak, and Flora turned away, resting
her head against the mantel-piece.
"Surely," said he, laying his hand on her shoulder, "you do not mean
that you like this man?"
"I did not think that you would be against it," said Flora, in a
choked voice, her face still averted.
"Heaven knows, I would not be against anything for your happiness, my
dear," he answered; "but have you considered what it would be to
spend your life with a man that has not three ideas! not a resource
for occupying himself--a regular prey to ennui--one whom you could
never respect!" He had grown more and more vehement, and Flora put
her handkerchief to her eyes, for tears of actual disappointment were
flowing.
"Come, come," he said, touched, but turning it off by a smile, "we
will not talk of it any more to-night. It is your first offer, and
you are flattered, but we know
'Colours seen by candle-light,
Will not bear the light of day.'
There, good-night, Flora, my dear--we will have a-tete-a-tete in the
study before breakfast, when you have had time to look into your own
mind."
He kissed her affectionately, and went upstairs with her, stopping at
her door to give her another embrace, and to say "Bless you, my dear
child, and help you to come to a right decision--"
Flora was disappointed. She had been too highly pleased at her
conquest to make any clear estimation of the prize, individually
considered. Her vanity magnified her achievement, and she had come
home in a flutter of pleasure, at having had such a position in
society offered to her, and expecting that her whole family would
share her triumph. Gratified by George Rivers's admiration, she
regarded him with favour and complacency; and her habit of
considering herself as the most sensible person in her sphere made
her so regard his appreciation of her, that she was blinded to his
inferiority. It must be allowed that he was less dull with her than
with most others.
And, in the midst of her glory, when she expected her father to be
delighted and grateful--to be received as a silly girl, ready to
accept any proposal, her lover spoken of with scorn, and the
advantages of the match utterly passed over, was almost beyond
endurance. A physician, with eleven children dependent on his
practice, to despise an offer from the heir of such a fortune! But
that was his customary romance! She forgave him, when it occurred to
her that she was too important, and valuable, to be easily spared;
and a tenderness thrilled through her, as she looked at the sleeping
Margaret's pale face, and thought of surrendering her and little
Daisy to Ethel's keeping. And what would become of the housekeeping?
She decided, however, that feelings must not sway her--out of six
sisters some must marry, for the good of the rest. Blanche and Daisy
should come and stay with her, to be formed by the best society; and,
as to poor dear Ethel, Mrs. Rivers would rule the Ladies' Committee
for her with a high hand, and, perhaps, provide Cocksmoor with a
school at her sole expense. What a useful, admirable woman she would
be! The doctor would be the person to come to his senses in the
morning, when he remembered Abbotstoke, Mr. Rivers, and Meta.
So Flora met her father, the next morning, with all her ordinary
composure, in which he could not rival her, after his sleepless,
anxious night. His looks of affectionate solicitude disconcerted
what she had intended to say, and she waited, with downcast eyes, for
him to begin.
"Well, Flora," he said at last, "have you thought?"
"Do you know any cause against it?" said Flora, still looking down.
"I know almost nothing of him. I have never heard anything of his
character or conduct. Those would be a subject of inquiry, if you
wish to carry this on--"
"I see you are averse," said Flora. "I would do nothing against your
wishes--"
"My wishes have nothing to do with it," said Dr. May. "The point is-
-that I must do right, as far as I can, as well as try to secure your
happiness; and I want to be sure that you know what you are about."
"I know he is not clever," said Flora; "but there may be many solid
qualities without talent."
"I am the last person to deny it; but where are these solid
qualities? I cannot see the recommendation!"
"I place myself in your hands," said Flora, in a submissive tone,
which had the effect of making him lose patience.
"Flora, Flora! why will you talk as if I were sacrificing you to some
dislike or prejudice of my own! Don't you think I should only
rejoice to have such a prosperous home offered to you, if only the
man were worthy?"
"If you do not think him so, of course there is an end of it," said
Flora, and her voice showed suppressed emotion.
"It is not what I think, in the absence of proof, but what you think,
Flora. What I want you to do is this--to consider the matter fairly.
Compare him with--I'll not say with Norman--but with Richard, Alan,
Mr. Wilmot. Do you think you could rely on him--come to him for
advice?" (Flora never did come to any one for advice.) "Above all--
do you think him likely to be a help, or a hindrance, in doing
right?"
"I think you underrate him," said Flora steadily; "but, of course, if
you dislike it--though, I think, you would change your mind if you
knew him better--"
"Well," he said, as if to himself, "it is not always the most
worthy;" then continued, "I have no dislike to him. Perhaps I may
find that you are right. Since your mind is made up, I will do this:
first, we must be assured of his father's consent, for they may very
fairly object, since what I can give you is a mere nothing to them.
Next, I shall find out what character he bears in his regiment, and
watch him well myself; and, if nothing appear seriously amiss, I will
not withhold my consent. But, Flora, you should still consider
whether he shows such principle and right feeling as you can trust
to."
"Thank you, papa. I know you will do all that is kind."
"Mind, you must not consider it an engagement, unless all be
satisfactory."
Ethel perceived that something was in agitation, but the fact did not
break upon her till she came to Margaret, after the schoolroom
reading, and heard Dr. May declaiming away in the vehement manner
that always relieved him.
"Such a cub!" These were the words that met her ear; and she would
have gone away, but he called her. "Come in, Ethel; Margaret says
you guessed at this affair!"
"At what affair!" exclaimed Ethel. "Oh, it is about Flora. Poor
man; has he done it?"
"Poor! He is not the one to be pitied!" said her father.
"Yes, she does! Very submissive, and proper spoken, of course, but
bent on having him; so there is nothing left for me but to consent--
provided Mr. Rivers does, and he should turn out not to have done
anything outrageous; but there's no hope of that--he has not the
energy. What can possess her? What can she see to admire?"
"He is good-natured," said Margaret, "and rather good-looking--"
"Flora has more sense. What on earth can be the attraction?"
"I am afraid it is partly the grandeur--" said Ethel. She broke off
short, quite dismayed at the emotion she had xcited. Dr. May stepped
towards her, almost as if he could have shaken her.
"Ethel," he cried, "I won't have such motives ascribed to your
sister!"
Ethel tried to recollect what she had said that was so shocking, for
the idea of Flora's worldly motives was no novelty to her. They had
appeared in too many instances; and, though frightened at his anger,
she stood still, without unsaying her words.
Margaret began to explain away. "Ethel did not mean, dear papa--"
"No," said Dr. May, his passionate manner giving way to dejection.
"The truth is, that I have made home so dreary, that my girls are
ready to take the first means of escaping."
Poor Margaret's tears sprang forth, and, looking up imploringly, she
exclaimed, "Oh, papa, papa! it was no want of happiness! I could not
help it. You know he had come before--"
Any reproach to her had been entirely remote from his thoughts, and
he was at once on his knee beside her, soothing and caressing,
begging her pardon, and recalling whatever she could thus have
interpreted. Meanwhile, Ethel stood unnoticed and silent, making no
outward protestation, but with lips compressed, as in her heart of
hearts she passed the resolution--that her father should never feel
this pain on her account. Leave him who might, she would never
forsake him; nothing but the will of Heaven should part them. It
might be hasty and venturesome. She knew not what it might cost her;
but, where Ethel had treasured her resolve to work for Cocksmoor,
there she also laid up her secret vow--that no earthly object should
be placed between her and her father.
The ebullition of feeling seemed to have restored Dr. May's calmness,
and he rose, saying, "I must go to my work; the man is coming here
this afternoon."
"In my study, I suppose. I fear there is no chance of Flora's
changing her mind first. Or do you think one of you could talk to
her, and get her fairly to contemplate the real bearings of the
matter?" And, with these words, he left the room.
Margaret and Ethel glanced at each other; and both felt the
impenetrability of Flora's nature, so smooth, that all thrusts glided
off.
"It will be of no use," said Ethel; "and, what is more, she will not
have it done."
"Pray try; a few of your forcible words would set it in a new light."
"Why! Do you think she will attend to me, when she has not chosen to
heed papa?" said Ethel, with an emphasis of incredulity. "No;
whatever Flora does, is done deliberately, and unalterably."
"Still, I don't know whether it is not our duty," said Margaret.
Margaret flushed up. "Oh, no, I cannot!" she said, always timid, and
slightly defective in moral courage. She looked so nervous and
shaken by the bare idea of a remonstrance with Flora, that Ethel
could not press her; and, though convinced that her representation
would be useless, she owned that her conscience would rest better
after she had spoken. "But there is Flora, walking in the garden
with Norman," she said. "No doubt he is doing it."
So Ethel let it rest, and attended to the children's lessons, during
which Flora came into the drawing-room, and practised her music, as
if nothing had happened.
Before the morning was over, Ethel contrived to visit Norman in the
dining-room, where he was wont to study, and asked him whether he had
made any impression on Flora.
"My dear Norman! Why, this George Rivers is really below the
average! you cannot deny that! Did you ever meet any one so stupid?"
"Really!" said Norman, considering; and, speaking very innocently, "I
cannot see why you think so. I do not see that he is at all less
capable of sustaining a conversation than Richard."
Ethel sat down, perfectly breathless with amazement and indignation.
Norman saw that he had shocked her very much. "I do not mean," he
said, "that we have not much more to say to Richard; all I meant to
say was, merely as to the intellect."
"I tell you," said Ethel, "it is not the intellect. Richard! why,
you know how we respect, and look up to him. Dear old Ritchie! with
his goodness, and earnestness, and right judgment--to compare him to
that man! Norman, Norman, I never thought it of you!"
"You do not understand me, Ethel. I only cited Richard, as a person
who proves how little cleverness is needed to insure respect."
"And, I tell you, that cleverness is not the point."
"I did wrong," said Ethel. "It is not the real one. It is earnest
goodness that one honours in Richard. Where do we find it in this
man, who has never done anything but yawn over his self indulgence?"
"Now, Ethel, you are working yourself up into a state of foolish
prejudice. You and papa have taken a dislike to him; and you are
overlooking a great deal of good safe sense and right thinking. I
know his opinions are sound, and his motives right. He has been
undereducated, we all see, and is not very brilliant or talkative;
but I respect Flora for perceiving his solid qualities."
"Very solid and weighty, indeed!" said Ethel ironically. "I wonder if
she would have seen them in a poor curate."
"Ethel, you are allowing yourself to be carried, by prejudice, a
great deal too far. Are such imputations to be made, wherever there
is inequality of means? It is very wrong! very unjust!"
"So papa said," replied Ethel, as she looked sorrowfully down. "He
was very angry with me for saying so. I wish I could help feeling as
if that were the temptation."
"You ought," said Norman. "You will be sorry, if you set yourself,
and him, against it."
"I only wish you to know what I feel; and, I think, Margaret and papa
do," said Ethel humbly; "and then you will not think us more unjust
than we are. We cannot see anything so agreeable or suitable in this
man as to account for Flora's liking, and we do not feel convinced of
his being good for much. That makes papa greatly averse to it,
though he does not know any positive reason for refusing; and we
cannot feel certain that she is doing quite right, or for her own
happiness."
"You will be convinced," said Norman cheerfully. "You will find out
the good that is under the surface when you have seen more of him. I
have had a good deal of talk with him."
A good deal of talk to him would have been more correct, if Norman
had but been aware of it. He had been at the chief expense of the
conversation with George Rivers, and had taken the sounds of assent,
which he obtained, as evidences of his appreciation of all his views.
Norman had been struggling so long against his old habit of looking
down on Richard, and exalting intellect; and had seen, in his Oxford
life, so many ill-effects of the knowledge that puffeth up, that he
had come to have a certain respect for dullness, per se, of which
George Rivers easily reaped the benefit, when surrounded by the halo,
which everything at Abbotstoke Grange bore in the eyes of Norman.
He was heartily delighted at the proposed connection, and his genuine
satisfaction not only gratified Flora, and restored the equanimity
that had been slightly disturbed by her father, but it also reassured
Ethel and Margaret, who could not help trusting in his judgment, and
began to hope that George might be all he thought him.
Ethel, finding that there were two ways of viewing the gentleman,
doubted whether she ought to express her opinion. It was Flora's
disposition, and the advantages of the match, that weighed most upon
her, and, in spite of her surmise having been treated as so
injurious, she could not rid herself of the burden.
Dr. May was not so much consoled by Norman's opinion as Ethel
expected. The corners of his mouth curled up a little with
diversion, and though he tried to express himself glad, and confident
in his son's judgment, there was the same sort of involuntary lurking
misgiving with which he had accepted Sir Matthew Fleet's view of
Margaret's case.
There was no danger that Dr. May would not be kind and courteous to
the young man himself. It was not his fault if he were a dunce, and
Dr. May perceived that his love for Flora was real, though clumsily
expressed. He explained that he could not sanction the engagement
till he should be better informed of the young gentleman's
antecedents; this was, as George expressed it, a great nuisance, but
his father agreed that it was quite right, in some doubt, perhaps, as
to how Dr. May might be satisfied.