MERCURY
Since love does not offer me any pleasure here, I will at
least enjoy myself in another way, and enliven my dismal leisure by
putting Amphitron out of all patience. This may not be very
charitable in a God; but I shall not bother myself about that; my
planet tells me I am somewhat given to malice.
AMPHITRYON
How is it that the door is closed at this hour?
MERCURY
What do you not want then? Speak, if you want to be understood.
AMPHITRYON
Listen, you villain: I will come up with a stick to make you
understand, and give you a fine lesson. How dare you speak to me like that?
MERCURY
Softly, softly! If you make the least attempt to create an
uproar, I shall send you down some messengers who will annoy you.
AMPHITRYON
Oh Heavens! Did anyone ever conceive such insolence? And from
a servant, from a beggar?
MERCURY
Come, now! What is the matter? Have you gone over everything
correctly? Have your big eyes taken everything in? He glares, so
savage he looks! If looks could bite, he would have torn me to shreds by now.
AMPHITRYON
I tremble at what you are bringing upon yourself with all this
impudent talk. What a frightful storm you are brewing for yourself!
What a tempest of blows will storm down on your back!
MERCURY
If you do not soon disappear from here, my friend, you may
come in for some mauling.
AMPHITRYON
Ah! You villain, you shall know to your confusion what it is
for a valet to attack his master.
MERCURY
Pass on, my dear friend; believe me, no one here will listen
to you. I respect wine. Go away, make yourself scarce, and leave
Amphitryon to the pleasures which he is tasting.
MERCURY
Rather: covered with the laurels of his fine victory, he is
side by side with the lovely Alcmene enjoying the delights of a
charming tete-a-tete. They are tasting the pleasures of being
reconciled, now their love-tiff has blown over. Take care how you
disturb their sweet privacy, unless you wish him to punish you for
your excessive rashness.
