MIRABELL, FAINALL, BETTY.
What, is the chief of that noble family in town, Sir Wilfull
He is expected to-day. Do you know him?
I have seen him; he promises to be an extraordinary person.
I think you have the honour to be related to him.
Yes; he is half-brother to this Witwoud by a former wife, who
was sister to my Lady Wishfort, my wife's mother. If you marry
Millamant, you must call cousins too.
I had rather be his relation than his acquaintance.
He comes to town in order to equip himself for travel.
For travel! Why the man that I mean is above forty.
No matter for that; 'tis for the honour of England that all
Europe should know we have blockheads of all ages.
I wonder there is not an act of parliament to save the credit
of the nation and prohibit the exportation of fools.
By no means, 'tis better as 'tis; 'tis better to trade with a
little loss, than to be quite eaten up with being overstocked.
Pray, are the follies of this knight-errant and those of the
squire, his brother, anything related?
Not at all: Witwoud grows by the knight like a medlar
grafted on a crab. One will melt in your mouth and t'other set your
teeth on edge; one is all pulp and the other all core.
So one will be rotten before he be ripe, and the other will
be rotten without ever being ripe at all.
Sir Wilfull is an odd mixture of bashfulness and obstinacy.
But when he's drunk, he's as loving as the monster in The Tempest,
and much after the same manner. To give bother his due, he has
something of good-nature, and does not always want wit.
Not always: but as often as his memory fails him and his
commonplace of comparisons. He is a fool with a good memory and
some few scraps of other folks' wit. He is one whose conversation
can never be approved, yet it is now and then to be endured. He has
indeed one good quality: he is not exceptious, for he so
passionately affects the reputation of understanding raillery that
he will construe an affront into a jest, and call downright rudeness
and ill language satire and fire.
If you have a mind to finish his picture, you have an
opportunity to do it at full length. Behold the original.